I Told You So

 

We're there - right where I warned we would be. We are at the part where fascist-Christo-republican-domestic-terrorists used trump to finally deliver everything they'd been working toward for decades. And, now that they've accomplished all of that
 

• destroying the Constitution, 
• turning this country into a theocracy where their quiverfuls of domestic terrorists walk the streets with WMDs, prepared to kill anyone who doesn't look or act the way they want

they're finally willing to give trump the boot and pile all of their atrocities - 

• seeds, planted by Reagan and 
• brought to harvest by Bush, McConnell, Boehner, Ryan, McCarthy, Trump, a criminally loaded, partisan beyond belief SCOTUS, and hordes of anti-America republican and emoprog voters with the help of apathetic masses of non-voters

.they're ready to send trump packing with all their baggage on his back. He deserves that but we don't deserve what that means - that they get to wash their bloody hands and be free.

 

As if that isn't devastating enough, I see people who STILL don't seem to *get it* throwing everything they have into HELPING THEM. There is no reason to praise any of these republican witnesses for doing the bare minimum that should be required of every employee, or friend, or human. Being honest is what everyone should expect, of everyone, EVERY DAY - not after the damage has been done, or they are finally trying to clean up a mess that they made that got out of their control so they have to minimize personal responsibility by fessing up.

 

All of these Republican witnesses have supported the party that told us and them decades ago that this is EXACTLY WHERE THEY WANTED TO BE. Some have admitted that they voted for TRUMP -- the worst of the worst who mocked disabled, bragged about grabbing pussies, had failed at everything in life, was a known snake who cheated everyone in business, evicted minorities, lusted after his daughter in front of cameras -- and will do so again if they get the chance. They are not good people JUST BECAUSE they are doing the right thing this one time (probably for self-serving reasons) and everyone (ESPECIALLY MEDIA) who is giving them this ridiculous lip service right now is helping them right before midterms.

 

***exactly like I told you would happen***

 

 

 

How Will You Face Your Grandchildren?

 

Next up - Tuesday, June 21 - January 6th Select Committee hearing #4. I hear from good sources that there should be some big surprises.

Even if there aren't big surprises, we should all be watching this.

Even if our rushed, immediate gratification lifestyles have caused us to be frustrated when a brave, brilliant man speaks slowly enough for his profound words to be printed in the history books as he speaks, we should all be watching this.

I've been in a super-reflective stage lately, partly due to traveling ba
ck in time for a writing project and partly due to the opposite - thinking about the future. My future, the future of people who aren't paying attention or acting, and the big question of will there be a future. If I weren't stalled in two big writing projects with a couple others on back burners, I've thought about writing BOOMER WARNING in which I do things exactly like what follows here.

The night of the first walk on the moon, I had THINGS TO DO. Danette's stepsister was in town, and we were all going to do make-overs and maybe -- just maybe -- learn how to be almost as beautiful as we all thought she was. Important shit to do. And my dad, totally uncharacteristically put his foot down (gently, of course) and said he thought I needed to stay home and watch this major event before I got together with my friends.

I can't imagine how stupid I would have felt later if I had not stayed home and watched. Especially when I got to meet Neil Armstrong later. I might have been too embarrassed to even take that opportunity. Then, I would have two reasons to feel stupid.

Now, I can't imagine how I would feel if I hadn't read, watched, discussed, pondered, tried to have some input/action for all of the major political events since then. I was *there* for the Nixon impeachment, all of the SCOTUS replacement hearings, the Clinton impeachment, both trump impeachments, the three real stolen elections and now the big lie about the steal that didn't happen - and halfway through the most important (by far) hearing yet - the one that could make or break democracy and lead to the death of humanity on this planet.

I look around at people who are too busy working, too busy having fun, too depressed, too happy, too lazy, too brainwashed, too whatever excuse they think rationalizes their refusal to be involved. And I think about how badly I wanted to leave this country in 2000 because to me it was dead the moment the SCOTUS (s)elected an unqualified man who didn't get the most vote to play (p)resident. The writing was on the wall, and I really wanted out. But the daughter who wasn't ready had children and how would I ever face my grandchildren if I hadn't done everything I possibly could to save their country for them?

In 2000, I totally dedicated my life to saving my country for my grandchildren. Totally. I spent time with those kids, but it wasn’t baking cookies and making paper flowers. It was political events, making posters, discussing current events, watching speeches on television . . . To be honest, I’m not sure today whether they appreciate or resent that. I hope it’s some of both. I’m sorry for the resentment part but I’m grateful that they are informed, thinking, caring, intelligent, informed, voting adults with a country still standing even if it’s on life-support.

2016 came. An even worse, more unqualified loser who didn't get the most votes, and who we knew had Russian help and lots of cheating to get there was made (p)resident and I wanted fucking OUT OUT OUT. But I had a new grandchild, born weeks before that election and the kids weren't ready to leave so I started over. Tired, frustrated, sad, angrier and more defeated than I had ever been in my life. Too disabled to be out there doing all I wanted to do but still I started over, doing what I could. Because, how would I ever face that last granddaughter if I hadn't do all I could do to save her country.

I ask everyone who isn't fully involved and working as hard as you can to consider this. HOW will you look your grandchildren in the eye when they are living in a Christo-fascist dictatorship, or another Syria, or worse? Because believing that isn't what happens if we don't get every Republican out of office from the top down to school board (especially school board, maybe) is not dealing in reality. Believing that that is an improvement is a death sentence for the planet. 

Or, do you think it won't matter how your grandchildren suffer if you aren't still around to witness their pain?

Seinfeld’s Jason Alexander gives URGENT MESSAGE for Jan 6Hearings

 

 

Who Took My Fearless?

I experienced 'changing with the times' in a terribly disappointing way today. As I was exiting a grocery, my purse over my shoulder, a bag in each hand, one hand also holding my keys, a man shouted at me from a picnic table nearby. Said he was hungry and asked if I would buy him a sandwich.

In the past, I would have handed him cash. This time, I knew I had twenties and coins and nothing between and, sadly can't afford to hand out twenties anymore. <--- Ahhhh it's all backwards, since everything costs more for them, too. So, I said I didn't have cash but hold on.

I unlocked my car, purse still on my shoulder, sat the bags on my seat, and pulled out a package of crackers and tub of artichoke/cheese dip. Yummy, and planned it for my lunch, but I could eat something else, and I offered it to him.

"No," he said. "I want a turkey sandwich."

And the memories flooded. I met a man one time when I really had left the office without cash, who wouldn't share my vegetable fried rice. He never did like rice. And my heart broke because that man looked hungry, and tired, and broken, and kind. And I wanted desperately to have him sit down and share my meal, and my friendship. And he would not.

I followed him for years, bringing him gloves, scarves, cash, and smiles. No rice. I wrote a poem about him and grieved when he disappeared, and I didn't know if it was due to finding a better place- or worse.

I told the guy I met today that I was sorry I had no cash for turkey. And I was sorry at that point.

He rose from his sitting position, appeared ready to step my way, and said, "Go back inside and use your card." No please, not like a question.

And I got in my car, locked the door, and drove away. Uncomfortable on every level. 😥

I miss being fearless.

On the drive home, I unpacked the many factors that were in play:

• COVID (this was a place where everyone still wears a mask to enter the store and I didn't see a mask on him and wonder if a homeless person has access anymore)
• times are depressingly tough for everyone, making it even harder for people who have to depend on generosity of others
• the heat (roads were literally melting in some places, power was out in several states, fires and flooding (both related to climate change), high winds in areas . . . had made many people irritable
• racists and domestic terrorists are emboldened by fascists formerly known as the Republican Party, probably making this man’s life harder and extremely disappointing at his age
• guns
  

Overthinking all of this is so much a part of me that all my related info and sadness kicks in spontaneously. Probably nothing mattered more than my *regret* that the reality of GUNS - combined with my age and disabilities - altered how I can honor who I really am.

To answer the question in my title, fascist-republicans made it dangerous for me to live my fearless and I blame Mitch McConnell first, along with the rest of the people he led, abetted, and carried into to a cult of mentally and emotionally unbalanced, anti-America, wannabe fascists.

 

The Real Profile in Courage

I am grateful for Liz Cheney's participation in the Jan 6 committee work. Extremely grateful for this one good act that will most likely end her political career. 

 

But, (and yes, I know that but takes away from the statement, maybe negates it) this alone will not make up for all the harm she has done or make her a hero or profile in courage by my carefully developed criteria. Heroic would have been speaking out BEFORE the party she voted in lockstep with put this country on life support. Heroic would have been standing before cameras and working hard to keep an unqualified, mentally unstable, criminally suspicious, known hypocrite, probably RINO and CINO man from being (s)elected the first time. Heroic would have been demanding a full investigation of Russian interference and electoral tampering before the inauguration.

Heroic would have been calling out her own father when he demonstrated that he was evil and corrupt, and when he made a fortune by invading Iraq instead of Saudi Arabia, home of the actual attackers. 

Profiles in courage don't abet the bad guys before they stand up against them.

 

If she leaves the fascist-republican party, and the NRA, and stays in office and VOTES to clean up the messes she helped make, I will update my overall opinion to give her the respect she will have earned.

 

Her history of voting in lockstep with fascist-republicans, and her negligence in not calling out her father, is unacceptable. She never did the right thing before and is suddenly receiving praise for finally doing ONE thing right and that's far too little too late for the praise and titles I see people who should know better offering her.  

 

HER ACTIONS/VOTES caused tremendous stress and work for good people who always do the right things - the HARD things, the things that risked their carriers and got them years of dishonest, hideous attacks from media and internet morons, the things for which they received many threats for many years.

 

NANCY PELOSI is THE Profile in Courage. Other Democrats who have worked long and hard with her also earned that title. 

Words Matter. 

Legacies Matter.